What Now- Be Thankful!

CU L8R she said, and so she did.  Shelia (mom) is woven into every moment of my life--my family, my home, my work, my ME.  I love her so.  I miss her so.  She did so much it seems to prepare me for this, but I am sad.  I must dig own deep and find the joy.  She would.  She taught her whole life long.  She taught with her words, but more importantly, she taught me with her actions. her deeds of kindness.  She showed me what she expected.  She showed me how she cared for her loved ones when their time had come.  And so I know what was expected of me.  She told me she was proud of how she cared for Nanny and Pappy.  She was thankful that she had the opportunity to be with them at the end.  So I guess, for that, I must too be thankful.  Oh how I wish it did not have to come so soon in my life.  But I see around me so many dear friends who bore this pain much earlier in their life.  I am so thankful for a loving mother.  She loved me unconditionally.  I tested her many times.  But she loved.  She wrote her love in books for me to find.  I am thankful for that.  She loved and she very seldom criticized me.  I should work on that.  She very seldom judged others. I should work on that too.  But I will break off pieces of this grief.  Hold them privately, Feel them deeply.  But then I must take my breath, close my eyes and picture the joy she brought me, the blanket of love that she wrapped around me and those I hold dear.  I am blessed to have been her only daughter.